Cara. Are we doing this? Are you putting words in my mouth? Kurt was reckless and stupid. What I did to try and bring you in was dumb and reckless. You headbutted me.
Not putting words into your mouth, John —- I’m only repeating what came out of it in the first place.
I’m not going to apologise for headbutting you, if that’s what you’re vying for. And I’m fairly certain that you weren’t referring to the subway when you said “dumb and reckless”.
“Many people, meeting Aziraphale for the first time, formed three impressions: that he was English, that he was intelligent, and that he was gayer than a tree full of monkeys on nitrous oxide. Two of these were wrong; Heaven is not in England, whatever certain poets may have thought, and angels are sexless unless they really want to make an effort.”
“Along with the standard computer warranty agreement which said that if the machine 1) didn’t work, 2) didn’t do what the expensive advertisements said, 3) electrocuted the immediate neighborhood, 4) and in fact failed entirely to be inside the expensive box when you opened it, this was expressly, absolutely, implicitly and in no event the fault or responsibility of the manufacturer, that the purchaser should consider himself lucky to be allowed to give his money to the manufacturer, and that any attempt to treat what had just been paid for as the purchaser’s own property would result in the attentions of serious men with menacing briefcases and very thin watches. Crowley had been extremely impressed with the warranties offered by the computer industry, and had in fact sent a bundle Below to the department that drew up the Immortal Soul agreements, with a yellow memo form attached just saying: "Learn, guys…”“
This book kills me. Everytime. My cousins have Aziraphale and Crowley from the book covers on their forearms. I’m totes jelly.
"The whole business with the fossilized dinosaur skeletons was a joke the paleontologists haven’t seen yet.
This proves two things:
Firstly, that God moves in extremely mysterious, not to say, circuitous ways. God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffable game of His own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, [ie., everybody.] to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch-dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a Dealer who won’t tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time.
Secondly, the Earth’s a Libra.”
The entire book is a masterpiece. Almost Hitchhiker’s Guide-grade perfect.
GOOD OMENS IS THE GOD DAMN CHRIST ON A CRACKER. <3
“Death and Famine and War and Pollution continued biking towards Tadfield. And Grievous Bodily Harm, Cruelty To Animals, Things Not Working Properly Even After You’ve Given Them A Good Thumping but secretly No Alcohol Lager, and Really Cool People travelled with them.”
I JUST ABOUT FRICKING PISSED MYSELF AT THIS PART
IT’S BEEN SITTING AROUND ON MY BOOKSHELF UNTOUCHED FOR A GOOD YEAR NOW I CAN’T BELIEVE I NEVER THOUGHT TO READ IT SOONER
